Angela and I first visited Center Parcs at Whinfell Forest when Will was still a baby. Now he’s almost 28, which feels faintly ridiculous. We’ve been coming here almost every year since then—sometimes even twice a year—with family and friends. This place is soaked in happy memories. Birthdays, Christmases, late nights, too much food, too much drink and endless laughter.
The children are all grown up now, some with children of their own, continuing the tradition. Walking back into Whinfell Forest feels like stepping into a living timeline of our family life.
It had been two years since I was last here. Given what my body has been through recently, I decided to treat myself to a full body massage to give my tired muscles some attention. I still had a few lingering trigger points in my calves and hoped it might help.
All eight of us arrived on Monday afternoon and spent the evening catching up properly—stories, laughter and reminiscing—until the wee small hours.
Tuesday: Archery, Knots and Pie Face
Tuesday began gently. Bev and I went for a walk around the site and managed to arrive slightly late for target archery, earning ourselves the traditional cheers of shame from the rest of the group. We learned how to work out our dominant eye, which completely amazed us all. Our archery skills varied wildly, but a few golds were hit, which felt like a triumph.
Later, Jackie and I went for full body massages—utterly indulgent and absolutely brilliant. My masseuse delivered the honest verdict that my body was “completely full of knots”: upper back, left shoulder, lower back, calves and feet. Not much left untouched then. Her recommendation? Weekly full body hot stone massages until the knots released. Blimey. I knew my trek had taken its toll, but even three months after finishing, my body clearly hadn’t forgotten.
That evening’s entertainment was Pie Face, with some people playing for the first time. Rhoda’s reaction to being splattered with squirty cream was exactly like Angela’s used to be. It brought back such vivid, joyful memories of playing this game with family over the years. Naturally, the game couldn’t end until everyone had been splattered.
Wednesday: Running, Spa Time and Reminiscence Therapy
Wednesday started earlier. Dave and I headed out for a run around the grounds, both wearing shorts and brightly coloured clothing—visible from space. Blimey, there are a lot of hills here. Dave powered up them far more gracefully than I did, but I kept going, just at a slower pace. We managed to chat for the first kilometre, then quickly ran out of breath. Still, we completed 5k (about 3 miles) without injury, which felt like a real win. A recovery walk back to the lodge followed, then a long bath and a good stretch.
The afternoon was spent relaxing in the Aqua Sana spa. Bev and I chatted while lying in a bed that resembled a giant nest, and I sipped a G&T from my water bottle—hydration is important. The steam room proved a bit too overwhelming for Bev, and not long after, it was too much for me too. We opted for the outdoor pool, bumped into Alex for a while, then finished off in the hydrotherapy pool, where the powerful jets pummelled us into wobbling submission.
Once we’d had enough vibrations, we retreated to the café for a cuppa and a good blether while waiting for Rhoda and Bridget to return from their massages.
Meanwhile, Dave and Steve had spent the afternoon in the sports bar. When they eventually returned to the lodge, they were—unsurprisingly—a little worse for wear.
That evening descended into what could only be described as a reminiscence therapy session in a nursing home. TV programmes, characters and theme tunes from the 1960s and 1970s dominated the conversation, accompanied by enthusiastic singing and dancing.
Thursday: Curling Chaos and a Perfect Ending
Dave, Steve, Bev and I were up early on Thursday morning after discovering that Steve and Dave, in their drunken wisdom the previous day, had booked a curling session for 9:30am. Despite the early start, it turned out to be great fun.
We split into teams—the Bros versus the Bras. Steve turned out to be a natural, playing some genuinely excellent shots. The Bros won hands down, and I rewarded them with chocolate medals, which felt entirely appropriate.
Bev went off for a relaxing massage while the rest of us regrouped for lunch. Jackie and I then went for a walk while the others played crazy golf.
On the recommendation of my masseuse earlier in the week, I treated myself to another massage—back, neck and shoulders—which was the perfect way to end the week. Exactly what my body needed.
We finished the trip celebrating Rhoda’s birthday with a Colin the Caterpillar cake from M&S, which went down an absolute treat.
Another visit to Whinfell Forest full of laughter, memories and moments I’ll treasure—proof that while time moves on, some places will always hold our hearts.
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